A prayer that matters most

Prayer for a little boy.
Now i lay me down to sleep,
I pray You, Lord, my soul to keep,
Your angels guard me through the night,
And keep me safe till morning light.
Make me a boy who's brave of heart,
Willing & strong to do my part,
Please help me to be good each day,
and always honest in my play.
Lord, while i live i want to be from,
quick and angry passions free,
With gentle thoughts and happy face,
and pleasant words in every place.
I pray whatever wrongs i've done,
you will forgive them, every one.
Be near me when i wake again,
and bless all those I LOVE. Amen.......
goodnight world.

2.31pm.. 27/08/2006

OFFICE!!!!. What the Tooooooooot!!!!!!!!!!!! am i doing in the office on such a nice day like this? The sun is shining nicely, the weather is beautifull and there isn't even much of a haze around KL... kinda rare not to find haze around KL if you ask me. besides that i find things are peachy i suppose.. no issues here, no job aborts... (bloody well touching a lot of wood to make sure there's no job aborts), i can pretty darn well say that everyone on my team doesn't like job abort. But working on weekends has it pro's and cons... no calls to worry, just monitor the servers and make sure things are at 100% go.... besides that i'm watching anime's and yay... listen to MP3... hahahahahaha. Nothing has been happening much i suppose... kinda like a monotonous lifestyle i'm having here.. I think my online gaming EVE has just took a turn for the worst.. The corp got moved to E02 and i sure as heck don't like it as hell. how the heck are we suppose to get the cash when there's poor rats, poor minerals?... ok. i saw that they have ice there but how the heck am i going to harvest those ice if i can't find ice HARVESTERS???? Shit... am actually applying to join -V- .. maybe they'll let me know on the results of my applications. other than that... quite good on my status actually. i finally got 580++mil on my EVE wallet. I just bought a retriever yesterday and boy that thing sure rocks... love the mining capability's of those things.

Listening currently to MAI HOSHIMURA... a very very nice album.. kinda relaxing.. not too much techno's to some of the ones i listen too. my blog certainly looks like shit... looks too damn formal.. i need some background thingyto change it for the better. on the plus site.. i need a picture to go with it too. i definitely got some pictures of myself but those pictures doesn't show a very very interesting self of me...

been reading back on my past blogs and i was wondering what the F*** was i writing... poetry!? i must be on a nutty bug. i definitely was on a nutty period. grrrrrr... thinking of those calls i have to do tomorrow makes me lose my mood. ok lah. its just some reinit logs and some others but still ... haih... those last minute buggers. Ngai Har Fuu is definitely a good thing sometimes. Doesn't make me too complacent eh?

ANIME's
Samurai champloo is quite interesting shall i say. sometimes i dun really get the idea of what they are trying to tell on that one. i still prefer Mahou Sensei Negima... that is a real funny anime... They should do a sequel on it or something. Imagine a 10 year old cute kid teaching a bunch of 13-14 year old teens. Man,.... its a pity that Negi didin't get himself ehem ehem.... hehe.....

'loss of words at the moment' maybe i'll come up with something to write...

9.35PM. More poeting?

Darkness arrives, thine self decayed,
Worn soul, worn mind.
Another day has passed by,
Slaving tasks, ended it has.

Longing for home, longing for comfort,
A beauty's rest, is all thy seek.
A little mirth, also a gain,
to comfort one, for the days ahead.

Missing people, missing laughter,
For "why thy ask", thine say these letters.
Unknown answers, "thou answers back",
Joy no more, the soul felts.

Rest and peace, is caused thy seek,
"thou knows the answers", the lords spoke,
abandons calling is thy own,
bear its pain, thy must.

Ponders more, sins done,
Rest not, the soul and body,
visions seen, words heard,
hellish torture, the souless endures,
wishing, thy journey's ends.

Patients endure, the clocks ticks,
longing for home and rest,
to seek joy in rest, for thy weary soul longs endure,
for more slaving the next morn.

6.09pm. Working? or going poetic?

My current mood:

Thy behold, the lovely light. Morning arrives and the warmth with it.
Passion felt, passion seen,
how art lovely thine morning felt.
But gayfull mood turns wrath, a wonder why it does.
Cause slaving is a must, for a pittance wage it does.

Here thine sat, in idleness he kept.
Wonders why, thine beauty of the sky.
Slave thy must, an endless task.
Memories of beauty, how lovely she graced,
the soul wepts, sorrows increase.
For no more thy found, thou beauty more,
and wonders aloud, aloud in a sorrowfull voice.

My love! my love! where art thou? hear me my love,
For thy heart aches, longing the sights of thee.
Fill my soul, grace me with thy presense, thine smell, thine breath.
Allure, ignite me, passions felt, mere touch it says,
Warms me, comforts me, gracing me, for thine days ahead.

Why sorrows felt,
Deepest sorrow felt, thy cannot express, of truth, that spoken it can't.
Joyfully thy eyes behold thee, yet fears thy felt.
For truth takes thee from me.

Guilty conscience haunts the soul,
For by thy biddings, thy sins destroys.
Thy soul wonders. Will forgiveness be mine? Condemn thou shall be,
to join the hellish nightmares.

Ponders much, ponders not.
What's done is done... Seeks redemption thyself. Hopes vanished thy felts.
Musn't ponders the soul spoke. Back to slaving must thy done.
For a pittance wage is must. Survived harsh world thy must.

3.40pm . OFFICE

somehow i feel better today... maybe its because we haven't really received any cases yet. maybe its also due to the good night's rest i had... small wonder what 1 to 2 hours extra can do to you. nicely sitting here right now waiting for 4pm so that i can do my AM, Central and US MPE monitoring. On the plus side, i'm listening to my MP3 while i'm working. soooo good!!.. Mai hoshimura is certainly pretty good to listen too. some what soft but very relaxing... can't get too relaxed thought. might be singing some song later in the office... the ZZZzzzZZZ one. heheh. i supposed some things can't be changed but i certainly observe certain human behaviors in the office that i don't think i approve.. i wish everyone just try their best to work. anyway... i'll continue later... not supposed to be blogging even... haha...

12.18am.. home

Somewhat i've not been pretty much in the mood for blogging. I have been feeling guilty all this whole week. I was pop a sensitive question to which i have no answer.. Why? why can't i tell the truth and face the consequences? i would generally assume that a major percentage of my lies are based on fears... Fears of the unknown? i don't really know the answer to that. Somehow i ask myself what am i doing with my life sometimes. I know i cannot do certain things but i always succumb to the worst sort of temptation... God? are you really around sometimes... i cannot help it but to doubt your presense that do not exist in my life! WHY?! WHY IS IT SOO HARD TO GET RID OF IT?! i am weary.. weary of all the actions of desires which continues to tear me apart bit by bit. it is a terrible suffering to endure.. i do wonder how on earth JESUS endures it all. Are we really worth all the suffering he goes thru? U know sometimes i feel its enough... come what may.. end it all. I despair at the thought of the day when i will have to face judgement and stand in front and give a full accountability of my pathetic actions that has disgrace the entire family. I cannot sleep properly for the pass few days.. i dunno... kinda makes me mad sometimes. i dun even have the mood to play eve... i dunno why.. its just really weary. kinda fatigued... ah what the hell. try to get some sleep.. i'm gonna need it.